17 Hilariously Incorrect Things People Believed About Sex

17 Hilariously Incorrect Things People Believed About Sex

Here are some of the best responses!


“I thought you got pregnant every time you had sex and people only did it to have babies. I remember saying to my friends with more siblings than me: ‘Eww your parents had sex FOUR TIMES!'”



“When I was told condoms were like plastic, I just assumed they meant hard plastic and was envisioning something more like a traffic cone on a penis.”



“I thought that when you had sex, it was through the woman’s belly button and not her vagina.”



“I thought a blow job was literally putting the dick in your mouth and blowing it like a whistle. I was like, ‘Why would anyone want that done to them?’ Thank god I learned what it actually was before I had a boyfriend.”



“When I was 7 I asked my mom what being a virgin meant (I had heard the word around, probably on TV), and she told me you were a virgin if you had never been in love with someone. At the time, I had a ‘boyfriend’ and considered myself to be in love with him, so I proceeded to tell everyone for the next year that I was not a virgin. Eventually a teacher heard me say it and called my mom in.”



“I thought that an erect penis hung down between a man’s legs and pointed straight at the ground. I guess I thought all penis/vagina sex was performed by scissoring.”



“I thought oral sex meant you were talking about sex. Like an oral book report.”



“I thought you got pubic hair by bumping parts with someone else who had hair down there. Like it just transferred from person to person.”



“I thought whenever a female orgasmed, an egg was released. In my mind, there was a trade-off, an orgasm for an egg. It made me never want to masturbate for fear of running out of eggs.”



“I thought using protection/having protected sex meant someone had to watch and make sure nothing went wrong.”



“I was told by another girl in high school that when nuns take their vows in the Catholic church, their menstrual cycles immediately stop for life because they will not be having children.”



“I got the talk when I was waayyy too young for my brain to actually process it, and the way my mother explained it made it sound so ritualistic that I thought it involved an audience? Like I literally thought other people were supposed to watch you do it, like to commemorate the moment or something. Like a graduation. Or an award ceremony.”



“I thought you only had sex once and then got pregnant as often as God or karma or whatever deemed it so. Because I couldn’t imagine why anyone would want to do it more than once.”



“When I was like 8 or something, I had not heard of an erection and I thought that the guy had to like, physically take his penis and shove it up the woman’s vagina, and that THAT was why sex was so noisy, because it hurt or something. I quickly figured out that was ridiculous.”



“I thought when the penis entered the vagina, it would just stay still for a bit. Like there would be no movement and the two people would carry on their day as usual attached to each other until they were pregnant.”



“I thought the balls had to go inside the vagina, and the sperm would osmosis through the ballsack.”



“I’m an open and out lesbian, so it goes with the story. I worked with this girl a few years ago, and I got my period by surprise. I asked her for a tampon, and she was extremely confused. Her response to my question was, ‘I thought lesbians didn’t get periods.'”


Do you have any funny misconceptions you (or a “friend”) had about sex? Share them in the comments and we might feature them in an upcoming BuzzFeed post or video!

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